The Henchman Episodes
by CosmicStoryTeller
Summary: These Henchmen are special, One goes from Joker's personal punching bag, to the one that shot Batman, to the one that stole Harley Quinn's heart, to even the one that screwed over Deathstroke himself. The Henchmen list goes on, this story names them.
1. Introducing Shane!

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman.

My name is Shane Truman, I'm Joker's first henchman, ever since he's been wearing that red cylinder on his head I was an accomplish in his diamond heists. I'm not just one of these mindless fools around here, I'm actually was the mind behind Joker's schemes when he was started out. Back when everything was PG when you saw him around.

I've been thinking about going full blown solo as a villain sometimes, so i won't have to share 5 grand with some idiots that'll just buy equipment to get their 5 grand back again. I've even got an reputation with other criminals, only known as the "Then Henchman that pissed off the Mayor" or "Shane that doesn't go out with vain" and "The Henchman that shot Batman". I ran into Batman while me, Joker and Harley where personality robbing the mayor. Batman knocked Joker out cold and was about to tie up Harley, so I got back up from a little beaten I got from the Bats as well and shot him in the back with my special made Revolver. It was blind luck i was able to pull that off without him throw his boomerang at my Revolver and throw a even bigger beat down. My Revolver was able to get through his 'Bat Armor'. So he wasn't getting up from that in a while, my Revolver is stronger then 2 Face's guns put together, i actually spend my money on useful things.

Ever since I made away with the money and left Batman there with a hole in his back, everyone in Gotham has heard about the Henchman that stole 1/4's of the city's money and shot Batman.

"Damn it Harley! You stupid failure!" Screamed Joker followed up with a slapping sound.

"Shane.. Why did you agree we'd guard their room this week? This is torture." My friend Hardback whispered to me.

"Man up Hardback, just slip in a your music." I responded.

"Hey your right! Thanks Shane." Hardback responded with a dumb goofy smilie.

I couldn't listen to this as much as he could, I could deal with the pain and suffering the Joker causes but I never liked it when a man attacked a women.

"I hate you, you stupid un funny clown!" Harley Quinn responded asking for more.

"Hmm is that so? SHANE!" Joker cried out to draw my attention.

"Yea Jokes?" I asked. I was the only one who was allowed to give Joker a nickname, anyone else who tried would end up missing in till we had a pretty good idea what happened to him.

"Get in here you big Dino! I have a surprise for you." Laughed Joker in his regular excited voice.

I walked in to see a Harley Quinn on pouting on the floor, it's wired because she'll usually ask for a better beating.

"Shane, my boy, my bird, my wing, my man, I want youuuuuu, to shot whiny baby Quinn here with that big o big Revolver in your hands. To teach her for trying to stab me." Laughed Joker.

I responded with a little worried in my voice, "Uhh, Jokey that's a little uncalled for don't you think?" I knew Joker was crazy but this is just.. well I guess nothing is to crazy for Joker. But it's Harley for crying out loud, why would she try to kill Joker?

"Shane! You gotta save me! He's trying to kill me!" Quinn said with a dramatic movie star voice.

"Damn it Quinn, you ruined the joke!" An angry Joker said.

"Joke?..." I asked.

"O I'm sorry puddin, I need some practice, can you ever forgive me?" Quinn said in a innocent voice.

"Of course darling, o and if you ever say I'm unfunny again, ill really kill you." Responded Joker kissing Harley on the cheek.

Why do I keep falling for this shit.


	2. Dexter, We Have A Problem Part 1

The name's Dexter Flint, Caucasian male, I was a Wall Street White Collar criminal, I plead Insane and with the money I got, tricking the Jury and the Judge was just another episode of stealing candy from a baby. Judge knew if he'd sent me to jail, i could get dangerous people on him and his family. So to get his own little way of punishing me, he sent me to Arkham Asylum in Gotham City.

Chapter 2: Dexter, We Have a Problem.

The judge really thinks he got me good to, everyone knows prisoners from New York sent to Gotham jail is dead in 2 days, tops. But I convinced everyone that I was born, raised and prayed right here in Gotham. You see a bunch of these idiots here are mostly from some super mastermind gang i've heard about from New York, so pretty much, their stupid.

"Hey Dexter, tell us about how you robbed that one bank down the block from here." Laughed one of the prisoners.

"Actually it's pretty far down, but you see I was never even seen. 6 bank robbers thinking they'll get away with 500 million comes to a safe licked clean like a New Yorker." I responded with a smirk.

Everyone in the prison listening on me were laughing as if crime was a funny joke being told from a comedian.

"Hey Dexter, you sound like a pretty ok guy, how bout you hitch along when Joker breaks us out today." Whispered Dave a fellow prisoner. He whispered it so only me and the prisoners around us could hear.

"Joker?" I asked, but before the guy could answer, a huge bang went of behind me, sounded like a explosion.

"Yep, Joker." Responded the Guard.

"Haha, Arkham, did you miss me baby!?" Shouted out an odd man with.. What it seemed clown makeup. He's blown a huge gaping hole into Arkham Asylum

"Yes, a full blown breakout, I love these kind of break outs!" Another guard shouted out.

"Ok my men only, I wouldn't want no Penguins on here, you'd just stink up the place! And if you try to sneak on here.. ill shoot you! " Laughed Joker excitedly making almost half the room sighed in disappointment. "Now everyone that has a smile, cross the big nice hole you little babies." Said Joker in a 'Adult to Baby' voice.

Then this Joker character shot a guy crossing the hole in the head, and he didn't even see it coming.

"Joker! He was one of us! He was on our diamond heist!" Cried Dave.

"Oops. Hehehe." Giggled Joker in till he shoot Dave in face as well.

Well there goes my ticket to ride along, I just sat back down at the lunch table, maybe I could escape when they leave. I could just book it and return to New York. New identity and everything.

"Wait, Um Joker, i think our fellow friend Dexter over there should come along as well. He robbed that super high tech bank all by himself." One of the prisoner, now henchman said pointing in my direction.

The other henchmen agreed.

"Oh so you think you have the skills to work under my Mistah J huh?" Asked a tempting girl who got her face up in mines and looked a lot like a Harley Quinn on those playing cards.

"And you do?" I responded getting my face in to hers.

She growled then slapped me, then turned her back to me and walked off, "Seems playing card gal has a little arm in her." I said, probably asking for more without realizing.

"Uh, Dexter not a good idea. Im sure you know already but Harley Quinn, her name... is Joker's girl, so I wouldn't mess with her if I was you." A scared Henchman said while shaking violently, worried about me since I am his cell mate.

"Yea that's right bud! I wouldn't mind having my Mr. J here put a nice circular hole in your head right now! And don't eva call me 'Gal' again!" Whined an angry Harley Quinn.

"HAHAHA! you have courage my boy, but what's stopping me from putting a big nice bullet through your skull?" Asked Joker.

"We'll Jokey, your just going to have to find out." I responded passing through to hole Joker caused by using explosives.

Everyone was in complete silence, no one ever acted that way with the Joker and made Harley Quinn look like a fool and live.

"Hmm, I might set up a _special _death with this one, but something tells me he'll bring good results and maybe even a certain bird dead." Said the Joker to Harley in a serious somewhat scary tone.

"We'll I don't like him." Pouted Harley Quinn.


	3. Dexter, We Have A Problem Part 2

"Hey, your names Dexter right? The names Shane, Shane Truman." Shane Said introducing himself.

"Oh yea, Truman. I heard about you, the guy that was around since Joker had the red thing on his face." I responded, I'm surprised these idiots could actually remember that far.

"Yea, come with Dexter, walk with me for a few." Shane said walking a bit forward. And as he wanted I did continue with him.

"So you need anything 'captain'" I laughed trying to be as friendly as possible.

Shane grew serious, "I know about you, Mr. Wall Street White Collar, unlike these idiots I pay attention to the news, unlike these idiots. So if you even see you, no, if I even think your trying to betray us, I'll reveal you without fucking thinking." Growled Shane.

I got in his face then said, "are you done?"

"Humph, yeah I'm done." Replied Shane before purposely bumbling into my shoulder while walking away.

"Dexter Flint may you please report to the office, I repeat Dexter Flint." Giggled Joker through an intercom I never knew they had. And I'm guessing they didn't kindly buy that piece of junk.

I walked up to the Joker's room which was a Harley's to, "Ah, Dexter my boy, it's time to prove yourself, it's time to see if you can really handle yourself in a bank robbery." Laughed Joker. While walking off, waving his hand indicating I should follow him.

"I hope you break a leg, literally. By a bat! Since it is night time. Annoyingly Harley scowled.

"Come on Harl!" Shouted the Joker.

"Coming puddin!" Responded Harley while she walked out and I followed.

Their load out was pretty impressive, but the rookies only got to use a handgun, what's a handgun gonna do in a bank robbery gone bad through? I'd say the name of this ridiculously heavily gun, but it's like I've ever held one in the first place. And the ride we were in was a huge SWAT looking car, I'm sure they didn't kindly but this thing either.

There where about 6 of Joker's henchmen coming including me, all rookies. It's rare for Joker to come along with the Rookies i heard. We weren't even told which bank we were robbing. Everyone wore there ridiculous clown mask but I didn't even bother, it's probably stupid to let them see the son of a bitch that robbed them but my face was already on the news for stuff like this, nothing new.

Everyone departed from the SWAT car, and Joker told them to hold up everyone as hostage and Me and Harley go get the cash, great.. More friend time with the annoying girl. Although I heard she was my age, 27.. What? I'm not going to hit on Quinnzie, I just meant that it won't be like.. Adult to Child.

I'm surprised no one told me to put on my mask but when we walked in, I wished I did.

"Dexter Flint? What's he doing here? What's going on!?" Everyone in the room started saying that our talking about something else with my name in it.

"Whoa, your pretty popular here huh?" One of the henchmen said.

Harley got mad at the henchmen talking about how of a big deal I am, "OK EVERYONE, You ALL should be afraid that The Joker is here before your stupid eyes! Not this loser!" Cried out Harley, almost looking like she'll blast up the place herself.

"Ok, ok, just keep that monster money grubbing Flint away, I don't wanna look at his face!" One of the women said with great angry.

"I think you have a fan club Dexter my boy!" Joker laughed. I'm just glad he thinks I'm the real deal.

"I'll go grab the cash." I said, as Harley followed me to the vault.

I haven't been to these kind of banks in **Gotham **since me and my best friend Bruce Wayne came here with our parents when we were kids, we'd buy toys and video games with the money we earned by doing lard work, good times.. It was pretty bad when I had to move away to New York, not long after that Bruce's parents died. Must have been a rough year. I heard he's still here in Gotham, I should give him a call sometime.

"So Quinnzie.." I said trying to start a conversation.

"Don't call me Quinnzie you jerk! And I don't care that your mr. Big shot here because my Mr. J is all-" ranted Harley before a scream came from the lobby.

"IT'S THE BATS!" One of the henchmen screamed before a loud punching sound silenced him.

"I gotta help Mr. J!" Harley cried out running towards the lobby before I grabbed her arm stopping her.

"No Quinnzie, we gotta catch him by surprise. I heard Batman does that a lot, so you'll just fight fire with fire." I smirked, Harley shook her head extremely worried about Joker.

"Calm on, do what I do and stay on my ass." I said while crouching down stealthily heading to the lobby.

When we got there this guy was a monster, he was wrecking all of the guys at once. I was considering using my handgun but I might need a melee weapon if this guy try's something and manages to get rid of my weapon.

"Hey Quinnzie, do you got a melee weapon I could use?" I whispered to her.

"Uh, yea. I got a base ball bat I always bring with me. Here use it." She whispered back.

So I toke the bat and then I slowly approached batman, after he just knocked on of our men out. I didn't want to get to close through, I pointed my gun at the back of his head, and said, "Hold it asshole."

He turned around and his serious look faded completely, "Dexter?"

So everyone knows about me? Great.. This'll make the fact I'm from New York easier to hide..

"Whoa, even the bats know Dexter!?" The henchmen that weren't out cold whispered amount each other.

"Ah Harley sweetie, do you mind un tiring me from this Bat rope?" Asked Joker in a fake sweet voice.

"I'm sorry about this Dexter." Said Batman before ducking down kicking my leg causing my gun to discharged but missed. And landed on the ground and Batman got on me a punch me so hard that it knocked me straight out cold.

I'm not an expert with this henchmen stuff, but something tells me I'm going to get knockout a lot...


End file.
